Evil Seeds – Photo: L. Weikel
24 Hours
It’s hard to believe sometimes that I can live an entire 24 hours and not unearth a single interesting thing to write about come the end of the day. It’s sad, really. But it’s the truth.
I was just sitting here contemplating what I might write about tonight when my eye spied a hint of yellow packaging barely visible peeking out from under a smooshed roll of paper towels beside the couch. I recognized that yellow packaging and aggressively told myself to ignore it. No good would come out of unleashing that evil.
Alas, I was struggling, yearning for a topic that was not just another excuse to post additional puppy pics. Although I have to tell you, I caught some especially cute moments today that warrant sharing. And who am I kidding? We all know they’ll come out sooner or later.
But I digress.
Evil Seeds
The packaging that originally whispered my name was now starting to taunt me. “Come hither, Sweet Thing,” the evil seeds lurking within their yellow party bag cooed. “I’m not sweet,” I thought. “You’re the sweets. Shut the hell up.”
I’m not proud. I can be pretty rude and abrupt when it comes to foodstuffs, especially those that offer no intrinsic goodness whatsoever. But these nasty nuggets are especially egregious, for they render me powerless. I’m one of those people who cannot eat just one.
So here I sit. If I’m honest, my tummy is starting to hurt just the tiniest bit; I’ve eaten far too many. Compulsively stuffing them into my mouth, these evil seeds are designed to forever tease satiety but never actually provide it. Instead, they taunt. “Just one more handful. We need to be eaten. What are you going to do, throw us away? That would be such a waste.”
Ugh.
I Blame Santa
Since I never buy these (ok, rarely ever), I’m sure they must’ve dropped out of Santa’s sack. If that’s the case, it would be a tragedy to waste them. And having traveled in his sack, surely they must have a little bit of magic to them. Don’t you think? Maybe that’s even why I can’t stop eating them! It’s not that I have no willpower! Eureka!
They’re enchanted. And – poof – look at that. A blog post magically appeared. (I regret to inform you that some evil seeds remain. To be ingested another evening, I’m sure…)
(T+32)