Fasting as a Way of Being

Cloud reflections; Photo: L.Weikel

It never fails. I feel good, vibrant.

I fast on Mondays, not for any health reason per se, but mostly because Karl and I got in the habit of doing so 27 years ago.

I know there was a time – a couple of years, perhaps, although that seems too long – that we put a temporary hold on that discipline. I’m not even sure why now. It may have been the loss of Karl, but to be fair, I really can’t – and shouldn’t – blame every disruption in our lives since 2011 on him.

It’s Become Like Second Nature

Indeed, it may actually have been a decade ago that we fell off the wagon for a brief while. Something tells me it may have been sometime after I started working for the Women’s Law Project, which was in 2003. Sitting here, I find it weird how I cannot distinctly remember a time since 1992 when we didn’t fast on Mondays. It feels so second nature to do so.

But I know we did go back to eating every day for a time. And it didn’t suit us. We missed the feeling, the strength, the sense of discipline and inner power that comes from just giving your system a rest.

Some days are harder than others. I’d say 80% of the time I barely even remember I’m fasting. It’s as if my system not only expects to take a full rest at least once a day, every week, but also revels in it. But those 20% moments? Those occasional times when I find my thoughts relentlessly turning to food or urging me to contemplate in exquisite detail just how tart and refreshing a nice juicy apple would taste? Those are the days I am most happy with my decision to hang in there. It’s those days that bring my attention precisely to what I’m doing and why. That focus on my commitment.

Unbeknownst to My Clients

One thing I really like about working at Medicine in Balance is the fact that I see clients on Tuesdays. As a general rule, I’ve made it part of my individual ritual to never drink alcohol the night before I see a client. That goes for anywhere, any time. If I know (or even suspect) I will be called upon to “do the Work,” as I call it, on any given day, I will take care and be discerning in what I ingest the day before.

But clients with whom I work on a Tuesday receive the added benefit of me not having eaten since Sunday evening. I honestly like it that way. It feels like a double-dose not only of commitment but also of clarity. Again, it always surprises me how clear and strong I feel while I’m fasting.

All that being said, sometimes in the evenings when I’ve broken my fast (like tonight), I find my eyes drooping and my body just wanting to fall asleep. And I ask myself, “Who am I to say no to my sweet body, which sustains me so well, day in and day out?”

So I go to bed.

Sleep well.